This last week has felt extremely long. I'm not saying that's a bad thing, but it has thrown me for a bit of a loop. Medical leave is definitely turning out to be exactly what I needed. While there are still some major stresses, *i.e. not knowing if my short term disability will even be approved and therefore not knowing when I'm getting paid next* just having this time to put myself first is a huge relief.
In the last week I have joined the gym, worked out (either yoga, weights or swimming) three times and have done a lot of walking downtown and in my neighborhood. I've bought a lot of healthier food for the house and am trying to eat at home more. I've also done as much sleeping as I've felt needed but for some reason the last two days or so I can't seem to sleep for more than a few hours at a time. I still only seem to have five to six hours in me before I just need to chill out and do as little as possible. However not having the stress and mental fatigue from my job have helped improve my mood immensely!! I still get tired and my body still hurts. I still get a little confused and emotional but not nearly like I did when I was working and trying to manage so many things at once. Even when issues do come up there is no pressure to make it go away, I can just accept what is happening and take appropriate action instead of fight with how I feel and what action to take based on "business need".
I'm also starting to really tap into the artistic side of myself and really want to start making things. I don't know yet what those things might be, but what the hell. I have time on my hands and I'm enjoying myself.
I really rather not think about it but for the sake of this blog I will add that my doctor also informed me that a lot of their notes they are submitting to my insurance states I should try to work part time at least on a trial basis. This news is freaking me out a tad as my job literally cannot be done in three hours a day. It's just not possible. I would be a hindrance to my company and those around me and likely more stressed out than I was before I left. This leads me to believe my claim for short term disability will be declined or they will force me to work at my job a few hours a day which as just mentioned is far more trouble than it's worth for all involved. Soooo if you're reading this please put it out to the universe, pray, etc that everything works out. I'm doing my best to simply trust that everything will happen exactly as it's supposed to and that keeps me calm most of the time. It would be super rad to know when I'm getting paid next though!
Okay, now it's time to attempt sleep again. Thanks for reading!
